Developing Discernment: Part 1
Developing Discernment
Since the onset of fall, I find myself diving deep into the life and practices of a 15th century Jesus follower known as Saint Ignatius of Loyola. I first came into contact with St. Ignatius during my training in Spiritual Direction. Since then, the lessons and practices left behind by St. Ignatius have been resources Jesus has continually used to grow my friendship with Him and continue the work of spiritual formation in my life. I find, however, that in the Protestant circles I live in Ignatius of Loyola is not well known, if he is known at all. For that reason, I thought it would be timely to write a series of blogs about who Ignatius was and the gifts he left behind.
The greatest benefit I have received from engagement in Ignatian practices is the development of discernment. Ignatius teaches that with time, attention, and practice we can develop discernment in collaboration with the Holy Spirit’s activity in our lives. Ignatius gives us tools for growing in our discernment of Jesus’ presence in our lives and how Jesus is continuing to invite us into His activity in the world around us. Therefore, I am called the series Developing Discernment.
Ignatius of Loyola
The man known today as Ignatius of Loyola was born Inigo Lopez De Loyola y Onaz in 1491. He was one of thirteen children born into a family of minor nobility. It was an age of growth, expansion, discovery, and great change. Growing up, Inigo’s dreams were for the thrill-seeking, fame-gaining, wealth-making adventures of knighthood. Pursuing this ambition, he was sent to serve in the court of Castile as servant to the royal treasurer. As one author states, “On his departure he was given a horse, weapons, and a sack of gold, and he set out to pursue a life of fame and fortune as well as gambling, womanizing and general mischief.”[i]
His pursuit of fame and fortune was brought to an abrupt halt when Inigo’s legs where severally damaged by a cannonball at the Battle of Pamplona in 1521. He was brought back to Loyola where he underwent several surgeries and tortuous treatments to re-extend one of his legs, which had been shortened by the injury. During his months of healing, there was not much Inigo could do to fill his time. He asked his caretakers for books to read, hoping for some adventurous tales of chivalry with which he could fill his imagination. However, the only books available were on the life of Christ and the lives of the saints. With nothing else to do, Inigo settled in with these books, which became his close companions.
Something unexpected, yet life changing, occurred from his friendship with these books. Inigo began to notice a shift developing in his interior life. He still held ambition of knightly glory, yet those dreams brought only temporary fulfillment. His imagination began to include a life of service to King Jesus, resulting in an undercurrent of peace and joy that was deeper and more consistent.
In his autobiography, Ignatius would write of himself in the third person saying, “When he thought of worldly matters, he found much delight; but after growing weary and dismissing them, he found he was dry and unhappy. But when he thought of…imitating the saints…he not only found consolation in these thoughts, but even after they left him, he remained happy and joyful.”[ii]
This was the start of what would be one of Ignatius’ greatest contributions – learning to discern the leading of the Holy Spirit by paying attention to interior desires, drawings, and responses. It was discernment based not on outward circumstances but by interior attractions and the fruit they bore. Through continued practice and ongoing conversations about the spiritual life, Ignatius learned to discern “carefully the interior movements of his soul: the attractions, feelings, thoughts, and desires that led him to greater intimacy with Jesus (which he called consolations) and those that were distractions to his spiritual growth (which he called desolations).”[iii]Italics mine Ignatius life revealed that discernment of Jesus could be learned through practice and attention. Christian freedom is the result of discernment as we grow to notice Jesus’ presence and invitations to us and receive the freedom to say yes to those desires that lead to greater intimacy with Jesus.
After much travel, education, teaching, and serving Ignatius founded the Society of Jesus (the Jesuits in 1540. This is a religious order known for being “Contemplatives in Action” practicing both continued discernment and a life of service. Ignatius passed away in 1556 after seeing the movement grow from 11 to include thousands around the world.
Consolation and Desolation
As previously described, while Inigo (later known as Ignatius) was recovering from his battle injury, reading through the available books on the life of Christ and the saints he began to notice his spirit responding to both new and old possibilities for his life. His continued reflection on chivalrous acts, glory, position, and power brought temporary excitement but, in the end, left him feeling dry and barren. However, considering his newfound vision of Christ left Ignatius with a continued undercurrent of peace and joy even after the initial excitement of the idea had faded. It is these responses of his spirit that He would come to call consolation and desolation. Coming to recognize consolation and desolation in our lives as a significant step on the journey of developing discernment
We can all identify with the ups and downs of Ignatius. Experiencing good days and bad days are simply a part of being human in this world. There are some days where the sun is shining, birds are singing, life is going well, and it is a joy to be alive. There are other days when it feels like a chore to get out of bed, and it does not stop until we climb back into bed at the of the day. However, consolation and desolation are not only about noticing our good and bad days. In consolation and desolation, we are invited to move deeper; we are asked to notice the posture and response of my heart towards God and others in the midst of what I am experiencing.
Consolation is marked by a grace that keeps me open to God, aware of His presence, and draws me towards collaboration with His work in the world. Consolation leads towards growth in Christ. While it is easier to live in consolation during the good days, the grace of consolation can also be experienced as faith, hope, and love as the undercurrent of our lives even when the surface is rough and stormy.
An example of consolation in joy may be Mary’s song when she arrives to visit with her cousin Elizabeth following Gabriels’s visitation. As the unborn baby who will be John the Baptist leaps in Elizabeths womb, Elizabeth recognizes the gift that has been given to Mary who response to God’s goodness and sings, “My soul glorifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior…” (Luke 1:46, NIV) Mary’s heart was filled with joy and hope in all that God was bringing about both in her life and in the world. In the Old Testament, Psalm 23 is, I believe, a picture of consolation. In this Psalm David walks with God in the many facets of life: quiet waters and still streams, the valley of the shadow of death, being surrounded by his enemies. Yet, in each space of life there is a sense of God’s presence with David that culminates in the declaration, “Surely your goodness and mercy will pursue me all the days of my life, and I will live in the house of the lord forever.” (Ps. 23:6, NLT)
In contrast, desolation is marked by a struggle to notice or feel God’s presence with me. This usually also involves a closing inward on myself which impedes collaboration with God’s grace in my life and with His working in the world around me. Desolation feels very distracting to my pursuit of following Jesus. Desolation can be a confusing experience to walk through. Jesus, who promised to never leave us or forsake us, seems to be distant and quiet. David expresses this in his lament of Psalm 13, “O Lord, how long will you forget me? Forever? How long will you look the other way?” (NLT) However, let’s remember that desolation is not only what I experience but how my heart is responding to God and others in the midst of all I am walking through. In his book, “God’s Voice Within”, Mark Thibodeaux helps us to see this as he defines desolation as “the inner pull away from God’s plan and away from faith, hope, and love.” [iv] Desolation can often be initiated by life’s hard circumstances but is has more do with how my inner life is responding to God and others in the midst of all that life contains.
One way I usually notice the difference between consolation and desolation in my life is the contrast between solitude and isolation. I am a self-declared introvert which simply means I replenish my energy in times of quiet and reflection. Existing as an introvert does not mean I dislike people. If fact, the opposite is true - I love people. And the best way I can love people is to plan periods of quiet where I can replenish expended energy. When in consolation this retreat into quiet is coming away to lean into God and His love for me. I am finding space to be with God in fellowship and joy, to be open the ongoing work of spiritual formation. The ultimate goal of solitude in consolation is to re-engage with people with renewed energy and out of rejuvenated faith, hope, and love.
However, in desolation the mood and goal are very different. Rather than solitude, I seek quiet time for isolation. I am not desiring fellowship of any sort – I am looking to just be left alone. I do not want to talk with God or engage with people. Often when in desolation the feeling of my mood is pity (poor me – I am so busy serving others that I can never get what I need) or anger (People are so inconsiderate – always wanting more and more without ever stopping to think about what I need!). Both solitude and isolation come from the same need – time away. Yet it is the attitude of my heart that determines how I enter into that time. Consolation leans into God’s grace while desolation leans away.
Leaning into Jesus in Consolation and Desolation
So, what do I do as I begin to discern consolation and desolation in my life? I do what I would also desire to do – make space for God’s grace to “empower me with inner strength through his Spirit.” (Eph. 3:16, NLT)
In consolation this means leaning into the grace of God that is already so present. I enjoy the presence of God that feels so close. I continue in my spiritual disciplines as a means of friendship with Jesus. Consolation is actually a great time to experiment with new spiritual practices and rhythms. How do I feel invited to engage in relationship with Jesus? What practices will support that desire? Is there a practice I have not yet tried but would like too? Go ahead and give it a try! Consolation is also a good time to, at the invitation of the Holy Spirit, invite God to be at work in the temptations, struggles, and ongoing spiritual transformation. In consolation – God’s presence is already felt so close, and I am open to His voice and working in a way that is, for the most part, joyful. This is the right time to focus on growth that is too difficult to engage in during times of desolation.
Leaning into God’s grace in times of desolation is more difficult but all the more needed. Desolation is not a time of large change – either in starting something new or stopping a commitment made while in consolation. In desolation, my motivations are not always faith, hope, and love; thus, making significant changes during this time can lead to choices I latter regret. Ignatius would encourage us to be stern with the spirit but gentle with the person (ourselves). This means I am not going to let desolation make my choices but neither am I going to engage in self-condemnation for the difficulty of the season. In desolation, I engage in my spiritual rhythms as a discipline trusting that God is at work even when I cannot feel it. In addition, I stay engaged in the community of Jesus who can be the hands, feet, encouragement, and compassion of Jesus when I cannot hear Him myself.
Spiritual direction is a practice that can be beneficial in time of desolation and consolation. If this rings true for you, please go to my website (www.wellspringspd.com) and use the contact form to reach out. I would be happy to either provide space for spiritual direction myself or help you find a spiritual director that will work best for you.
The next blog in our Developing Discernment series will look at a tool Ignatius developed to help us notice consolation and desolation – the Prayer of Examen. God’s grace and peace be with to you!
[i] Larry Warner, Journey with Jesus: Discovering the Spiritual Exercises of Saint Ignatius (Downers Grove, IL: IVP Books, 2010), 263.
[ii] Kevin O’Brien, The Ignatian Adventure: Experiencing the Spiritual Exercises of Saint Ignatius in Daily Life (Chicago, IL: Loyola Press, 2011), 6-7.
[iii] Ibid., 7.
[iv] Mark E. Thibodeaux, SJ, God’s Voice Within: The Ignatian Way of Discovering God’s Wil(Chicago, IL: Loyola Press, 2010), 12.